It’s a sordid tale, my friends, stemming from my experimentation with the Jamaican Mango & Lime Resistant Formula Locking Gel. Anyhow, after using the gel, my hair just didn’t feel like how it should feel. My ends were rough and knotty; the hair itself just wasn’t as moisturized as it normally was.

While all that was happening, I decided to try blow-drying and flat ironing my hair. I know! I know! My hair is already dried out and I go with my fastness to drop heat in it. Alas, I wasn’t as savvy as I thought I was. So I blow-dry, breaking off my ends as I go (how did I know? I heard and felt them pop off). After that, I proceeded to put oil in my hair (hoping it would smooth out the ends) and flat iron it – essentially frying it. Honestly, I don’t know what I was thinking. When I was finished, about two inches of my ends were fuzzy, knotty, unable to straighten and a lovely colour my sister called, musty brown.

There was no way I could curl these ends – my goal was a sleek bob with ends curled under – so I put about eight Chinese bumps in. In the morning, I had glorious, fluffy, big curls – and trashy ends. How ghetto. Nonetheless, work called and I had to get moving. I did the bumps for the rest of work week as my ends broke, shed and snapped.

On Friday, I went searching for hair shears. I went to Trade Secrets and was SHOCKED by a $45 pair of scissors. Really? I am not Vidal Sassoon or Paul Mitchell! I was thinking that I would have to use my utility scissors to chop off these hideous ends… but wait, wasn’t Shoppers just around the corner? (Did I tell you how much I love Shoppers? Really, I truly do. This is a newfound love affair. They have almost everything I need. Now, if they’d just install a big screen TV showing football, tennis or golf and some comfy couches, the Hubby would join me as I peruse their aisles for goodness.) I got my shears for $10. Yay me!

Saturday afternoon – after watching YouTube videos and reading blogs about trimming your own natural hair, I got started. Most of the people online say that trimming regularly isn’t necessary – unless you have split ends or an abundance of fairy knots (one strand knots that so small fairies must have knotted the hair). Hello, hi – that was me! I started to snip – I could feel where my hair was damaged and where it was healthy. That was about 2½ inches. GASP! That’s plenty hair when your hair shrinks up to your scalp when it’s dry.

Danged JML! Chupse.

I started cutting, hair flying and covering my bathroom floor and sink. The Hubby peeped in: “What are you doing?” He seemed a bit concerned.

“I’m cutting my hair,” I answered.

“Why don’t you go to the hairdresser for that?”

“Because I don’t wanna have to depend on anyone to take care of my hair. I want to learn,” I answered.

“Well,” he said, “as long as you know, only one of us in this relationship can be bald and that’s me.”

I rolled my eyes. “Whatever – I have work to do.” Snip. Snip. Snip.

Forty-five minutes later, I was surrounded by tufts of musty brown hair and a significantly shorter ‘fro. I was sad that I had lost some length, but happy that my ends weren’t trashy and rough.

I proceeded to wash, style and condition – and it felt pretty good. The biggest thing? No tangles when I started styling.

What’s the moral of the story?

1. Beware of strange products – you don’t know what lasting effects they’ll have.
2. The drugstore is your friend. Specialty hair stores like Trade Secrets or the BSO tend to be more expensive than Shoppers or Pharmasave.
3. YouTube is your friend. The ladies on YouTube have so much knowledge about so many aspects of natural hair care. If you are thinking about a style or cutting your own hair, visit YouTube for information.